Video Game Crunch Everything tastes better with a little crunch!

Maybe you have felt it in the night air in these past weeks. Something is stirring the winds of change, bleaching the mutlicolored fabric of reality and reshaping existence as we know it. In a sense I am both afraid and overjoyed to break the information to you myself....it's Jake's 24th freakin' birthday. If you didn't get him a gift he's willing to forgive you and accept belated gifts all the way up to his death. The $100 price floor set for gifts is an all time low and standard for such a prestigious fellow, so feel free to buy him several. Leave a post or send unmarked, non consecutive, large denomination bills in a secured envelope to his off shore address. But if you're as cheap as I am, just leave a little love on the message boards.

Something to note, whoever sent the hooker needs to punch air holes in the freight box next time, there is no bin at the recycling center for corpses, but we do appreciate the thought.

Happy Birthday you Son of a B****!